Praise and Salvation False: Difference between revisions
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[[http://www.amazon.com/Egg-Cuber-Square-Press/dp/B002C8ZDQE How to make a square hard-boiled egg in your own kitchen...]]
Latest revision as of 14:34, 17 February 2014
Praise and Salvation False is a complicated chicken farmer encountered during the events of Snuff. It is left uncertain what exactly a complicated chicken is, but we find that one of False's hens laid a square egg, which is, at least, thoroughly confusing. It seems that he has weak lungs and (bizarrely) a wooden toe, although the manner of the injury is probably better kept unexplained.
It is a character trait of people with a False name to try and explain the etymological derivation at every possible situation, even when faced with a watery death. In this case, the oft-trotted out explanation is that the family originated with the Klatchian Thalassa, which was eventually mispronounced as the surname we know now. It seems that several residents of the Shire have foreign ancestry.
During the course of Snuff, he stowed away on the Wonderful Fanny, in order to get to Quirm to set up a chicken houses for his business. However, when the barge was overtaken by Stratford and his crew he hid in a corner under some tarpaulin, on the basis that he had a bad knowledge pf fighting (chickens don't get aggressive) and no weapons. It must be said, however, that, in Sam Vimes' eyes, the contents of his toolbox- mallets, sledgehammers, saws, a crowbar and a large circular awl- came under the heading of 'weapons of mass destruction'.
Square eggs have actually been commercially sold in Japan. Apparently the trick is to get the egg the instant it leaves the chicken, while the shell is still soft and malleable (Have you ever wondered how something that big comes out of a chicken without causing her too much discomfort? Hence the slightly teardrop shape of the egg.) While the shell is still warm and plastic, it is put into a glass mould and gently pressed into cuboid shape... the shell then hardens into its final square form, from which it may only be broken, not reshaped.