Abominations Unto Nuggan

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Nuggan became one of the more powerful among the newer gods of the Discworld. He was the state god of Borogravia, but also in charge of paperclips, correct things in the right place in small desk stationery sets, and unnecessary paperwork. He was very serious about setting prohibitions, which his followers call Abominations. Nuggan thought that a god ought to prohibit things that people truly want, so that the prohibition has real effect on people's lives. So, Nuggan set the rules that his people should eat neither chocolate nor garlic.

The Abominations came so thick and fast that the Holy Book of Nugganism took the form of a loose-leaf binder which his priests and devotees took care to keep stocked with fresh paper. It has been observed that new Abominations wrote themselves in much the same way that the biographies in Death's library write themselves. But just as those biographies cease to be written at the point of death, it has also been observed that Abominations faltered to virtually nothing with Nuggan's presumed slump into Small God status.

The Compleat Discworld Atlas notes that the Book of Abominations has been extensively rewritten and re-organised by his dwindling band of worshippers in a way that would make a lawyer or a civil servant proud. We also know from context that there are least 6,668 Abominations in the Book. The necessarily abridged list quoted in The Compleat Discworld Atlas includes:

  • Abomination 14 (a) 1,2,3,9+ Any book, pamphlet, periodical or newspaper that is not directly inspired by the word of Nuggan.
  • Abomination 435 (aquatic): live fish.
  • Abomination 4834 (subsection II) Saucers.
  • Abomination 6329: Teeth that are false and not of Nature, and, as the benevolence of Nuggan, intended.
  • Abomination 6330: Mechanical devices for the measuring of time.
  • Abomination 6543 (Nuggan The Caring) Umbrellas or any other Devices that shield the wearer from the Blessings of Nature.
  • Abomination 6547: (subsection iv) Shoehorns and corn plasters.
  • Abomination 6573: (subsection; natural processes) Any preparation, cream, unguent, distillation or powder that interferes with the natural course of such inflictions deemed of penitential value, as Nuggan, in His mercy, sees fit to bless his people with.
  • Abomination 6668: Hatboxes of an un-natural shape.

Known Abominations Unto Nuggan which are mentioned in passing in the canon include:

  • Chocolate
  • Garlic
  • Mushrooms
  • The colour blue
  • Babies
  • Crop rotation
  • Girls in men's clothing (whether the other way round is an Abomination, too, remains unknown)
  • Girls knowing how to write
  • Pictures of living things
  • Cats
  • Dwarfs
  • Barking dogs
  • Oysters
  • Shirts with six buttons
  • Cheese
  • Messages in the sky (Clacks and carrier pigeons) as prayers may bump into them
  • Rocks
  • Ears
  • Accordion players
  • Theatres and similar
  • The smell of beets