"Fartmeister" Carter

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Trevor Likely's shabby and disreputable best friend. He lives, forgotten almost by his own family, in a leaky ill-favoured attic papered with centrefolds from Girls, Giggles and Garters.

Carter could benefit by laundering his clothes more often, washing more often, and refraining from the physical ability from which his nickname is conferred.

While a loyal friend to Trev, which gets him seriously battered by the hard men, Carter is weak-willed, indecisive, and will run with the crowd rather than think for himself.


The star professional footballer let down by a bad choice of best friend who can so easily become a leech on him. Think of the role played by Jimmy "Two-Bellies" in the drink-related downfall of genuinely gifted flawed legend Paul Gascoigne - an ill-advised best friend who Gascoigne could not bear to lose on becoming famous and who provided embarrassment at best, and career-destroying drunken benders at worst.

Or virtually the entire Rooney family, a clan of Liverpool scallies so notorious that the fragrant Coleen wanted to exclude the entire tribe from her wedding to Wayne.