Reader in Esoteric Studies
He spent so much time reading in what the Bursar prefers to call the "smallest room" that he is often referred to as the "Reader in the Lavatory", even on official documents. For the Reader in Esoteric Studies had a theory: that all really good books (or, at least, the funny ones) will gravitate to a pile in the privy. However, no one ever has enough time to read them all of them, or even know how they came there in the first place. His research, however, was causing extreme constipation among the other Faculty members and a queue outside the door every morning.