Lord Nine Mountains was a nobleman of the Agatean Empire during Interesting Times. Like many of the other Agatean nobles, he is shocked by the mannerisms, the appearance, and, well, the existence of Cohen the Barbarian, who has just appointed himself emperor. Along with Lady Two Streams, Cohen ordered him to eat food that Lord Hong had poisoned (and intended for Cohen and the rest of the Silver Horde). While he protested that he had a large breakfast and was full, the presence of One Big River somehow caused him to regain his appetite. (In a manner similar to a previous confrontation between a previous Emperor and a previous Grand Vizier).
He then exploded, removing an area of floorboards and a circular part of the ceiling, along with himself.
Described by Cohen as having a nose like a badger and being fat. He wore a pink hat... at least, he did, until he exploded.