Sconner Nobbs
| Sconner Nobbs | |
 | |
| Name | Sconner Nobbs |
| Race | Human |
| Age | middle-aged |
| Occupation | Army deserter |
| Physical appearance | {{{appearance}}} |
| Residence | Ankh-Morpork |
| Death | Has been dead for a while, in Feet of Clay Nobby tells how he got the signet ring from his father on his death bed, and his dying father's last words "Give it back you bugger!" |
| Parents | Son of Slope Nobbs |
| Relatives | |
| Children | fathered Cecil Wormsborough St John ('Nobby') Nobbs and Errol Nobbs |
| Marital Status | married Maisie Nobbs |
| Appearances | |
| Books | mentioned occasionally |
| Cameos | {{{cameos}}} |
Sconner Nobbs was the father of Nobby Nobbs and spent most of his time in the Tanty - the City Watch jail. A petty thief and looter, he was also a vicious drunkard who used to beat Nobby - and presumably Errol Nobbs and Mrs Maisie Nobbs too - exceedingly violently as a child. It is said that some of the beatings Nobby received actually broke bones. Nobby's elbow still twinges on cold days - a permanent reminder of his father.
Nobby's most pleasant memory of him is that once, when he was sober for two whole days, he made Nobby a set of wooden soldiers, whose boots came off and whose teeth could be pulled out; essential education for the young Nobbs. He also made the entire family hide in the cellar whenever the Watch came calling.
Considering his vague but unpleasant descriptions, it's little wonder Nobby Nobbs turned out the way he did.
He was known to those closest to him as Number One Suspect.
Annotation
The word "sconner" and its variants are not complimentary in Roundworld Scottish slang - indeed, the Nac Mac Feegle are on record as having employed this useful vocabulary item (albeit as "scunner"), to denote a rogue, a bully, a reprobate and a generally untrustworthy person.