Pepe

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A most unusual dwarf, considering where he came from and what he does...ten drinks short of happy.


Pepe is cool. Pepe is mysterious. Pepe is dangerous. Pepe is Fifth Business, the outsider, the watcher, the unseen force, the game-piece of Fate (or the Lady). Pepe is, in fact, the leopard who can change his shorts. He is, by his own description, a bastard, an old bugger and a sod and all of these are probably accurate.

Pepe is a most unusual Dwarf, even considering Giamo Casanunda. This is, first, because he's actually human, "a Lobbin Clout boy", adopted as a Dwarf much later in life than Carrot Ironfoundersson and much less Dwarvish in manner. As a Dwarf, he is unusually tall and slender; as a Human, he is quite short and slight but very wiry. His fondness for the Demon Rum, or Demon Champagne, or demon aftershave for that matter, is extreme even among Dwarves and his capacity is extreme even among Humans. Despite the quantity of alcohol he absorbs, he is not an alcoholic and drinks only after the job at hand.

When the job is done in public, at Shatta or some show or event, he affects the mannerisms expected of a gay fashion designer: wrists limp, hands fluttering, shrieks and giggles high and frequent. Otherwise, the wrists are very strong and the voice may range from calm and assured to low and threatening.

Very much as Mr Nutt is doing, he has escaped the "crab bucket" and found worth. He, too, was from a despised minority on the mean streets of Morpork, but became a respected (if hardly respectable) designer, artificer and even alchemist. He is the creative partner in Shatta, and the life partner of Madame Sharn as well. Their innovative Micromail and what he proposes to call Retribushium(1) will make him very rich. He does not forget his youth, though, and will help others out of the crab bucket or visit severe deterrents on up-and-coming bullies like those he remembers.

"Pepe" is probably a nickname, but he has no other.


(1)Morporkian spelling.